We finished our first semester today. It has to get easier, right? Well, for anyways, we are free for 2 weeks. I made sure we are free for 2 weeks by staying until 4:00 even though we could have left at 1:00. That really overjoyed David. It even made sure we were there at 3:00 when the fire alarm went off, and all the other staff were gone, so it fell to me to coordinate with the fire fighters and the electricians. (No fire, just faulty wires. I felt weirdly authoritative, though, greeting the fire truck. Authoritative mixed with ridiculous, since sometimes people think I'm in high school myself.)
Tonight we watched Me and Earl and the Dying Girl, a movie based on a book that I got an advanced copy of from an English professor giving away books. The book was mostly hilarious and a little touching. The movie was mostly touching and a little hilarious. Which has now put me in this odd mood. Which is why I decided to blog on my first free night.
There's this scene in the movie where the protagonist Greg gets in a fight with another kid in the cafeteria, and all the kids gather around, and some of them get out their phones to film. That reminded me of Tuesday morning in my class, where the kids were gushing with news of a fight the night before between a classmate and a kid in another class. The classmate kid wasn't in school that day. Didn't want to show his face. And all the other kids were upset no one had filmed the fight.
Next day he ate lunch in David's room.
Yesterday he ate lunch in my room.
Today he skipped (along with half the students).
I don't think all teenagers are terrible. There are some very sweet kids in that class. And the kid with the black eye is not somehow morally superior. But why do we do this? Are we terrible or just shallow?
Of course, yesterday the same kid hid under a table to avoid talking to a girl who thinks she's dating him, but he's not interested in. One moment I was talking to him, and the next he was just under the table. Ah, high school intrigue. Apparently he's tried to text her to tell her he's not into her, but she didn't get the message, so he was trying to get other students to go tell her for him.
So anyways, now I'm lying under this giant pile of blankets, because for some unknown reason we won't heat our apartment above 50. Next to me there's a pile of Ferrero Rochers and Ferrero Rocher wrappers, because there were boxes of the chocolates in the gift bags we got from school today. The most classic other item in the gift bag was an MSE combination bottle opener, measuring tape, and flashlight. I can now add that to my collection of MSE-logoified items of a sweatshirt, mug, and toiletry travel bag. At this point David would want me to point out that he already found a use for the mystery tool in measuring some distance on his classroom wall to hang his periodic table.
In babysitting duty this morning (half day) I led the kids in playing spoons and handed out donuts, and when we finished, as I bribed some kids to clean up with more donuts, they blasted music and danced around. And then tried to boycott moving into their next class by blocking the door with desks so I couldn't make them leave.
Earlier this week a girl told me, "Yours is the only class I look forward to every day." Make the other 79 students worth it?
Also earlier this week, I told this kid to sit down and do his work, and he cussed at me, so I wrote him up, and he got a suspension. My old roommate asked if my kids had done anything especially funny or bad today, so I relayed this story, and she texted back something sad, a broken heart, and asked if I was okay. It was sweet of her, but the point of this story is that I kind of laughed at that text, because while being appropriate to how I may have reacted last year, now it demonstrates how I've changed, a result of how my surroundings have changed. Something like that simply cannot upset you, or you're doomed.
That was a bit rambly, eh? Reflections on life so far, I suppose. But now it's Christmas! I've been looking forward to this for so long, and of course now it's here, it doesn't seem real. But oh, it needs to be. And the beauty of life is that it is. Or the beauty of God.
Sometimes you feel things so deeply you don't know how to say it. That's when some people paint or go running. Maybe that's when I blog. So I have no idea what I'm really trying to say here. Except maybe love. Which sounds, of course, trite. But every deepness goes back to love.
I am constantly astounded both by the depth and shallowness of my students, moment by moment. I suppose that's the paradox of being a teenager.
Merry Christmas to all, with much love,
Anneke
Friday, December 18, 2015
Sunday, December 6, 2015
Gaining our voices
In the 3 weeks between Thanksgiving and Christmas, we have a short unit on speeches in sophomore English. The unit is called "Gaining a Voice." Our focus questions are 1) What can a voice achieve? 2) How should I use my voice? and 3) What does silence mean? Below are student journal responses.
What can a voice achieve?
"A voice can achieve a lot of things in life. Martin Luther King Jr. had a voice and he basically ended segregation. If you speak up and say everything that you think, people would like you or will hate you but you'll always be true to yourself. A voice is basically everything about you in life. Without a voice, how are people going to feel what to say?"
"A voice can achieve anything. Just like Obama achieved to be the 1st black president. A voice can achieve a better life. A voice can achieve anything in life."
"A voice can achieve great things like changing the mind of a bad person, giving speeches, and more. Martin Luther King Jr. achieved great things and achievements with his voice. He changed many people about their kind and give hope to his kind. A voice also solved many problems like arguments between countries, conflicts between people who hate each other. A voice also makes historic announcements like the boycott of Alabama. A voice can achieve many great things and also solve small and huge problems without violence."
"A voice can achieve many great things. It can make someone do something or stop doing something. It can make you seem brave when you're really terrified inside. It can be used to express deep feelings. It also could just make someone's day better."
How should I use my voice?
"I should use my voice to speak clearly. I should use it to change. I should use it to save and change the future."
"People should use their voices to stand up for what they believe in, to fight for equality and peace, and last but not least use your voice to stop bullying. For what you believe in can cause you to not be afraid of anything; it's your voice so use it to fight for your beliefs. You use your voice to make everybody feel loved and equal. Lastly, use your voice to stop bullying; doing this one thing, using your voice can prevent heartache, pain, and feeling left out/lonely."
"I should use my voice to help better this world and help people. I should use my voice to stand up for people who don't speak for themselves. I should use my voice to enlighten situations no one talks about. My voice can help myself and everyone else. My voice can also hurt me if I use the wrong words of choice. 1. Speak up for homeless people in Africa. 2. Use my voice to help people whose families are affected by cops. 3. Speak up for homeless people without clothes or food."
"I should use my voice to represent a happy tone. It shouldn't be filled with bad words, because it's not right. I should use my voice as a voice for young people, and for African American girls everywhere."
"When using my voice I always try to speak clearly for the people to understand. I use my voice for respect and for standing up for what's right. I use my voice to defend the children and the people I care about."
What does silence mean?
"Silence shows more action than words do. Because it expresses the words that you can't express just using words. It shows more emotion than words do."
"Silence is when there is no sound heard or made by any person, animal, or object. It is the absence of any form of audible sound. There are lots of people in the world that are facing world problems like domestic, physical, verbal, child, and even animal abuse, yet many of them live in silence because they are either afraid or ashamed."
"Silence can mean many things, some people are naturally quiet. A lot of people speak less, but in cases, some are afraid to open their mouth and speak up. In some reasons silence is good, some people can just sit in silence and still have a full conversation with each other. I guess silence is kind of mysterious."
"Silence is the absence of sound. It is the only true peace. Silence cannot be heard, nor seen, yet everyone understands what it is. It is the one thing everyone wants, but no one can handle. Silence makes mad men happy, and it makes happy men mad."
---
I have no idea what I'm doing with my life, but for now my voice is in my classroom here in Memphis. My complete silence would probably get me fired, so not really an option, but what I chose to address and what I choose to let go everyday is my choice. May I choose my battles and stands well. May we all.
Happy Advent!
Anneke
What can a voice achieve?
"A voice can achieve a lot of things in life. Martin Luther King Jr. had a voice and he basically ended segregation. If you speak up and say everything that you think, people would like you or will hate you but you'll always be true to yourself. A voice is basically everything about you in life. Without a voice, how are people going to feel what to say?"
"A voice can achieve anything. Just like Obama achieved to be the 1st black president. A voice can achieve a better life. A voice can achieve anything in life."
"A voice can achieve great things like changing the mind of a bad person, giving speeches, and more. Martin Luther King Jr. achieved great things and achievements with his voice. He changed many people about their kind and give hope to his kind. A voice also solved many problems like arguments between countries, conflicts between people who hate each other. A voice also makes historic announcements like the boycott of Alabama. A voice can achieve many great things and also solve small and huge problems without violence."
"A voice can achieve many great things. It can make someone do something or stop doing something. It can make you seem brave when you're really terrified inside. It can be used to express deep feelings. It also could just make someone's day better."
How should I use my voice?
"I should use my voice to speak clearly. I should use it to change. I should use it to save and change the future."
"People should use their voices to stand up for what they believe in, to fight for equality and peace, and last but not least use your voice to stop bullying. For what you believe in can cause you to not be afraid of anything; it's your voice so use it to fight for your beliefs. You use your voice to make everybody feel loved and equal. Lastly, use your voice to stop bullying; doing this one thing, using your voice can prevent heartache, pain, and feeling left out/lonely."
"I should use my voice to help better this world and help people. I should use my voice to stand up for people who don't speak for themselves. I should use my voice to enlighten situations no one talks about. My voice can help myself and everyone else. My voice can also hurt me if I use the wrong words of choice. 1. Speak up for homeless people in Africa. 2. Use my voice to help people whose families are affected by cops. 3. Speak up for homeless people without clothes or food."
"I should use my voice to represent a happy tone. It shouldn't be filled with bad words, because it's not right. I should use my voice as a voice for young people, and for African American girls everywhere."
"When using my voice I always try to speak clearly for the people to understand. I use my voice for respect and for standing up for what's right. I use my voice to defend the children and the people I care about."
What does silence mean?
"Silence shows more action than words do. Because it expresses the words that you can't express just using words. It shows more emotion than words do."
"Silence is when there is no sound heard or made by any person, animal, or object. It is the absence of any form of audible sound. There are lots of people in the world that are facing world problems like domestic, physical, verbal, child, and even animal abuse, yet many of them live in silence because they are either afraid or ashamed."
"Silence can mean many things, some people are naturally quiet. A lot of people speak less, but in cases, some are afraid to open their mouth and speak up. In some reasons silence is good, some people can just sit in silence and still have a full conversation with each other. I guess silence is kind of mysterious."
"Silence is the absence of sound. It is the only true peace. Silence cannot be heard, nor seen, yet everyone understands what it is. It is the one thing everyone wants, but no one can handle. Silence makes mad men happy, and it makes happy men mad."
---
I have no idea what I'm doing with my life, but for now my voice is in my classroom here in Memphis. My complete silence would probably get me fired, so not really an option, but what I chose to address and what I choose to let go everyday is my choice. May I choose my battles and stands well. May we all.
Happy Advent!
Anneke
Thursday, November 26, 2015
Thank you
Happy Thanksgiving! Now that I have recovered from the feast enough that I no longer wish to throw up (yes, I know you all wanted to know that), here are 100 people/things I am thankful for:
1.
God, for hope
beyond all and love despite all
2.
David, for your
constancy, being in this with me, breakfast in bed, and Netflix binges
3.
Netflix
4.
Chick-fil-A
5.
Chick-fil-A
sauce
6.
Health insurance
(love that “cost: $0.00”)
7.
Modern medicine
(what did people do for headaches before?!)
8.
Pumpkin pie
9.
Brian, for your
music suggestions and encouragements
10.
Bette, for
surprise packages at just the right moment
11.
Caitlin, for afternoon
phone calls and unwavering belief
12.
Andrew, for
comic relief
13.
Jonathan, for
your honesty
14.
Abby, for your
thoughtful notes and questions
15.
Caitlin Marie,
for your optimism
16.
Kaitlyn
Elizabeth, for your hugs
17.
Anderson, for
making me laugh at it all and laughing with me
18.
Tijunae, for
giving me hope for all of us
19.
David S., for
offering to beat up misbehaving students
20.
Grandma W., for
your warmth
21.
Grandpa W., for
your little comments that say it all
22.
Grandma E., for
looking after me
23.
Grandpa E., for your
anecdotes
24.
Mom, for being
my mentor
25.
Dad, for Skyping
me in the middle of your work day when I was having bad day
26.
Caroline, for being
so dependable
27.
Sophia, for
looking deep
28.
Lauren, for doing
everything that needs doing
29.
Joshua, for
always being so happy to see me
30.
Sam, for
noticing when I was feeling better and entertaining my many questions
31.
Mikki, for encouragement,
hugs, and talking about books
32.
Erv, for showing
YouTube videos in Sunday school
33.
Donuts at church
34.
Capleville, for
lengthy greetings
35.
Millbrook, for
taking us back in
36.
AP & TH, for
coming when I’m about to lose my mind
37.
Wolfgangs, for
having pancakes that put dessert to shame
38.
Squash
39.
Butter
40.
Brown sugar
41.
Highways
42.
GPSs
43.
Sweet potatoes
44.
Ice cream
45.
Trees
46.
Mary Oliver
47.
J.K. Rowling
48.
Mitch Albom
49.
Paulo Coelho
50.
E.E. Cummings
51.
Used book shops
52.
Chocolate
53.
Tea
54.
Pillows
55.
Heated car seats
56.
Warm water
57.
Happy socks
58.
Popcorn
59.
Erasers
60.
Snow on pine trees
61.
Snow on bare
branches
62.
ZL, for
always greeting me
63.
BG, for
always asking about my weekend
64.
LK, for
trying
65.
SH, for your
comments that say everything I’m not allowed to say
66.
LW, for being
brilliant
67.
AH, for your
curiosity and persistence
68.
JJ and
KH, for quietly doing everything I ask
69.
ER, for your
pursuit of excellence
70.
Apples
71.
Peanut butter
72.
Public libraries
73.
ET, for that
look on your face when you accidentally drop kicked a pen into my back
74.
Billy, for your
care and hugs
75.
Christopher, for
all the beautiful nature pictures your post on Instagram
76.
Hanten
77.
Photographs
78.
Laughter
(especially when the alternative is crying)
79.
Perspective
80.
Flowers
81.
Earthworms
82.
Crossword
puzzles
83.
Frozen yogurt
(excuse for the toppings)
84.
Gibson’s Donuts
85.
Soy sauce
86.
Kale
87.
Hairdressers,
for pampering me
88.
Life
89.
Health
90.
Ferrous sulfate
91.
Whipped cream
92.
Teapots
93.
DW, for
fixing my computer and pencil sharpener (every time)
94.
DC, for
fixing my stapler
95.
Dishwashers
96.
The ocean
97.
Lotion
98.
Electricity
99.
Automatic
billing
100. Comfortable shoes
100. Comfortable shoes
(Mostly that helped to make me thankful, so congratulations if you made it all the way through!)
Off to boil another cup of tea now -
Love and thanks to all,
Anneke
Sunday, November 8, 2015
Bird houses and Halloween candy
This past week Thursday all the sophomores took the ACT Plan test (like the PSAT). I was assigned to administer the test to the more...boisterous class of 10th graders. After taking over an hour to bubble ("Are you interested, not interested, or slightly interested in learning how to build a bird house?" + 70 other items and etc.), we settled into 2 hours of silence.
Yes, silence. You read that correctly. Apparently, when things reach a certain level, they can take them seriously. But that's not what I'm here to say.
When I got past the mind-boggling boredom of walking around a room watching students take standardized tests in silence for 2 hours, or perhaps because of that boredom, as I reflected on the situation, watching my students take the test, this feeling rose up inside of me.
Fondness.
I know that that doesn't really make any sense, but in that moment I felt fondness for my generally most troublesome class (this would be the class that I write about, for example, throwing crackers at me). They were doing what they were supposed to do, I felt like I was being a real teacher, and they asked me questions as if they needed me.
So the beauty of being a teacher touched me this week in the most unexpected situation. I realized that I am involved in the lives of all of these students. I am their teacher, whether they like me or not, and I am here to guide them and support them. In what other profession do you get to form relationships with so many seemingly random people? Public education - it serves anyone. There are no requirements past being a certain age and living in the city. And that makes our shared humanity seem so real.
Then of course, the next day in the same class, I was forced to dictate notes to a student to write on the board so that I could view the entire class at once, because that is the only way to prevent them from throwing things at each other. (Earlier in the week a girl got hit in the face with a jawbreaker and required ice. Week after Halloween ups the ante in the throwing wars.)
And then I got to leave the classroom to hang out with a friend and eat Chinese food and, for the first time, go to a drive-in theater, where we munched 90% off Halloween candy and snuggled in blankets against the cold. And now here I am Sunday night again, after we watched the entire first season of How to Get Away with Murder on Netflix yesterday and today, blogging, and feeling Monday morning creeping up on me. But maybe one more dish of ice cream first.
Side note on the throwing wars of the boisterous sophomores: One day this week one of the students from the boisterous class was in my calmer sophomore class during break, and he asked me which of the sections was better behaved. At first I thought he was joking, but he kept asking, so I said, "Well, this class never had paper and toilet paper throwing wars in my class, they don't start dance parties in the corners of my room, and they don't get up and run around the room yelling."
"Oh," he said, "Well...we don't do that that often! Only like...once a day!"
On an even less related side note that connects in terms of a lack of concept of numbers, today the children's message at church was about giving. The speaker started by asking if the children would rather find a dollar or a penny on the ground, and then why. "I would rather find a dollar," one boy said, "because it's a lot more. A dollar is like FOUR pennies." At this point someone must have whispered to him the truth, because after a pause he shouted, "A hundred pennies! Oh my God!"
Cheers,
Anneke
Yes, silence. You read that correctly. Apparently, when things reach a certain level, they can take them seriously. But that's not what I'm here to say.
When I got past the mind-boggling boredom of walking around a room watching students take standardized tests in silence for 2 hours, or perhaps because of that boredom, as I reflected on the situation, watching my students take the test, this feeling rose up inside of me.
Fondness.
I know that that doesn't really make any sense, but in that moment I felt fondness for my generally most troublesome class (this would be the class that I write about, for example, throwing crackers at me). They were doing what they were supposed to do, I felt like I was being a real teacher, and they asked me questions as if they needed me.
So the beauty of being a teacher touched me this week in the most unexpected situation. I realized that I am involved in the lives of all of these students. I am their teacher, whether they like me or not, and I am here to guide them and support them. In what other profession do you get to form relationships with so many seemingly random people? Public education - it serves anyone. There are no requirements past being a certain age and living in the city. And that makes our shared humanity seem so real.
Then of course, the next day in the same class, I was forced to dictate notes to a student to write on the board so that I could view the entire class at once, because that is the only way to prevent them from throwing things at each other. (Earlier in the week a girl got hit in the face with a jawbreaker and required ice. Week after Halloween ups the ante in the throwing wars.)
And then I got to leave the classroom to hang out with a friend and eat Chinese food and, for the first time, go to a drive-in theater, where we munched 90% off Halloween candy and snuggled in blankets against the cold. And now here I am Sunday night again, after we watched the entire first season of How to Get Away with Murder on Netflix yesterday and today, blogging, and feeling Monday morning creeping up on me. But maybe one more dish of ice cream first.
Side note on the throwing wars of the boisterous sophomores: One day this week one of the students from the boisterous class was in my calmer sophomore class during break, and he asked me which of the sections was better behaved. At first I thought he was joking, but he kept asking, so I said, "Well, this class never had paper and toilet paper throwing wars in my class, they don't start dance parties in the corners of my room, and they don't get up and run around the room yelling."
"Oh," he said, "Well...we don't do that that often! Only like...once a day!"
On an even less related side note that connects in terms of a lack of concept of numbers, today the children's message at church was about giving. The speaker started by asking if the children would rather find a dollar or a penny on the ground, and then why. "I would rather find a dollar," one boy said, "because it's a lot more. A dollar is like FOUR pennies." At this point someone must have whispered to him the truth, because after a pause he shouted, "A hundred pennies! Oh my God!"
Cheers,
Anneke
Friday, October 30, 2015
Sophomore "sonnets": chicken and cheese and other loves
We're currently reading A Midsummer Night's Dream in 10th grade English. Today we looked at sonnets and then attempted to write some of our own. Here are a few of the results...
For starters, my personal favorite:
Chicken is good to me
Greasy legs that I love
Feel like I'm a chicken
So good that I feel like a dove
O, chicken chicken
Better than fruits
O, chicken chicken
Love chicken better than Fruity Pebbles
O chicken
So good
O chicken
Make me pop the hood
Yum o yum
Yum
A more serious take:
As the air grows colder and colder,
The leaves of trees turn from green to red
The colors tell you they are getting older
It just tells me the will soon be dead
From yellow to orange to brown
Seeing the leaves change is stunning
But, it's a shame to see them fall to the ground
But, this means money will be running
Animals gather for the cold.
Grass stops growing and turns brown.
And colorful flowers no longer mold.
The cute little birds no longer make a sound
Thus autumn is just like a stage of life.
Thus, let's enjoy before we die by knife.
More of the 75% of the "sonnets" about food:
Fried cheese is the best
It's so delicious and crunchy
It was hard to finish the rest
But mmmmm! munchy munch munchy
So yellow and hot
Just ready to be eaten
I mean, how could you not?
That cheese just has to be beaten
Obviously I love to eat cheese
I don't know who wouldn't
I always ask for more and end my question with please!
But Mom said I couldn't
Come join the cheese gang
It'll hit your stomach with a bang
(We had some trouble coming up with rhymes for "crunchy" on that one.)
Some commentary on my assignment (and perhaps classroom discipline):
It is hard to write a poem
There are different steps you have to take
You could write about a totem
Or write about someone with a rake
You also have to make sure it rhymes
It has 14 lines in it
It doesn't have to take a long time
And that you sit
There can be tons of things in it
You can write about love
And would be good if you have a lot of wit
Or you can write about a dove
Whatever you write about it
Make sure it doesn't make someone want to spit
Some more prettiness:
The sky is so big and vast
And wide like the ocean blue
It has been this way since way in the past
So this phenomenon is nothing new
It changes color with the time of day
From blue, to red, to pink, to black
From dusk to dawn it carries on this way
And every time it changes back
The sky is a wondrous thing
It has many hidden mysteries
The sky surrounds the Earth like a ring.
It's one of the amazing commodities.
The sky is forever a part of the Earth,
It has been here way before human birth.
I think this one gave up on the volta:
I have to go to school
to get my education
It's not really that cool
but I don't want a bad reputation
I have to get my books
grab all my pencils
my head is going into loops
I'm going to use all my utensils
I have to get my diploma
Graduate with all A's and B's
I want to be a better persona
Then take a picture and say cheese!
Boom Boom
The end! <3
(I tried to tell her that "books" and "loops" don't rhyme. Apparently she didn't take to that.)
This one strikes me as a rap:
Money is the option
Success is the key
To travel to the islands and tropics
And see the sea
Hustle is the way
Move in my pace
Striving for the Great
Leaving my trace
My goals are set
I have to reach them
I accomplished the best
Reaching the rim
Striving for Great
Stay out of my way.
And some more ambition:
I have hopes and dreams
I hope one day to do big things
But it doesn't include a team
That includes earning a wedding ring
Males these days only want to be pleased
My mom say you don't need nobody
They consider money as cheese'd
Cuz every guy want a gurl that's pretty
Maybe love isn't worth my time
I look to the future for my love
It seem to everybody falling in love is a crime
I hope to dream just because
To me I don't really care.
I just hope one day somebody there
A more traditional subject:
Loving you was honestly hard
You really had my heart
Buying me things like cards
At a little mart
But you played me like a deck of cards
My friends were really right about you
Kinda like the king of hearts
You played me like a foo'
Being together was amazing
I knew it wouldn't last long
Kinda blazing
But here's my song
Things are different now
I finally found my vow
I think this young man took my divisions between the sections to heart a little too much:
I watched the game.
The player scored off the board.
The game was lame.
At the end their mascot roared.
I love eating ham
I also like eating chips
But I love grape jam.
And taco dip
My mom makes me do chores
I like going outside
Her favorite class is choir
Their mouths are very
My brother is very tall
He also likes to play basketball
(Or perhaps that is what happens when you overly fixate on rhyme.)
And now, some life reflection to send everyone off:
The life we live,
The decisions we make
The love we give
The collisions we take
Our choices do not define us
The actions we choose to take
The noises all around us
The reactions we make
If you have regret
Life is not a game
The way we met
Life can sometimes be a shame
Respect is earned not given
This heartful text I'm sending
Cheers,
Anneke
For starters, my personal favorite:
Chicken is good to me
Greasy legs that I love
Feel like I'm a chicken
So good that I feel like a dove
O, chicken chicken
Better than fruits
O, chicken chicken
Love chicken better than Fruity Pebbles
O chicken
So good
O chicken
Make me pop the hood
Yum o yum
Yum
A more serious take:
As the air grows colder and colder,
The leaves of trees turn from green to red
The colors tell you they are getting older
It just tells me the will soon be dead
From yellow to orange to brown
Seeing the leaves change is stunning
But, it's a shame to see them fall to the ground
But, this means money will be running
Animals gather for the cold.
Grass stops growing and turns brown.
And colorful flowers no longer mold.
The cute little birds no longer make a sound
Thus autumn is just like a stage of life.
Thus, let's enjoy before we die by knife.
More of the 75% of the "sonnets" about food:
Fried cheese is the best
It's so delicious and crunchy
It was hard to finish the rest
But mmmmm! munchy munch munchy
So yellow and hot
Just ready to be eaten
I mean, how could you not?
That cheese just has to be beaten
Obviously I love to eat cheese
I don't know who wouldn't
I always ask for more and end my question with please!
But Mom said I couldn't
Come join the cheese gang
It'll hit your stomach with a bang
(We had some trouble coming up with rhymes for "crunchy" on that one.)
Some commentary on my assignment (and perhaps classroom discipline):
It is hard to write a poem
There are different steps you have to take
You could write about a totem
Or write about someone with a rake
You also have to make sure it rhymes
It has 14 lines in it
It doesn't have to take a long time
And that you sit
There can be tons of things in it
You can write about love
And would be good if you have a lot of wit
Or you can write about a dove
Whatever you write about it
Make sure it doesn't make someone want to spit
Some more prettiness:
The sky is so big and vast
And wide like the ocean blue
It has been this way since way in the past
So this phenomenon is nothing new
It changes color with the time of day
From blue, to red, to pink, to black
From dusk to dawn it carries on this way
And every time it changes back
The sky is a wondrous thing
It has many hidden mysteries
The sky surrounds the Earth like a ring.
It's one of the amazing commodities.
The sky is forever a part of the Earth,
It has been here way before human birth.
I think this one gave up on the volta:
I have to go to school
to get my education
It's not really that cool
but I don't want a bad reputation
I have to get my books
grab all my pencils
my head is going into loops
I'm going to use all my utensils
I have to get my diploma
Graduate with all A's and B's
I want to be a better persona
Then take a picture and say cheese!
Boom Boom
The end! <3
(I tried to tell her that "books" and "loops" don't rhyme. Apparently she didn't take to that.)
This one strikes me as a rap:
Money is the option
Success is the key
To travel to the islands and tropics
And see the sea
Hustle is the way
Move in my pace
Striving for the Great
Leaving my trace
My goals are set
I have to reach them
I accomplished the best
Reaching the rim
Striving for Great
Stay out of my way.
And some more ambition:
I have hopes and dreams
I hope one day to do big things
But it doesn't include a team
That includes earning a wedding ring
Males these days only want to be pleased
My mom say you don't need nobody
They consider money as cheese'd
Cuz every guy want a gurl that's pretty
Maybe love isn't worth my time
I look to the future for my love
It seem to everybody falling in love is a crime
I hope to dream just because
To me I don't really care.
I just hope one day somebody there
A more traditional subject:
Loving you was honestly hard
You really had my heart
Buying me things like cards
At a little mart
But you played me like a deck of cards
My friends were really right about you
Kinda like the king of hearts
You played me like a foo'
Being together was amazing
I knew it wouldn't last long
Kinda blazing
But here's my song
Things are different now
I finally found my vow
I think this young man took my divisions between the sections to heart a little too much:
I watched the game.
The player scored off the board.
The game was lame.
At the end their mascot roared.
I love eating ham
I also like eating chips
But I love grape jam.
And taco dip
My mom makes me do chores
I like going outside
Her favorite class is choir
Their mouths are very
My brother is very tall
He also likes to play basketball
(Or perhaps that is what happens when you overly fixate on rhyme.)
And now, some life reflection to send everyone off:
The life we live,
The decisions we make
The love we give
The collisions we take
Our choices do not define us
The actions we choose to take
The noises all around us
The reactions we make
If you have regret
Life is not a game
The way we met
Life can sometimes be a shame
Respect is earned not given
This heartful text I'm sending
Cheers,
Anneke
Sunday, October 25, 2015
Choice
This week, like every week, was composed of good and bad. But I think (and perhaps this is the perspective I can only have on Sunday nights) that the thing is to choose to see the good. To choose to trust. To choose to have hope.
"Courage doesn't always roar. Sometimes courage is the little voice at the end of the day that says, 'I'll try again tomorrow.'" - Mary Anne Radmacher
If that is not the story of all life, it is at least the story of my life right now.
Yesterday (Saturday) was our second all-day TFA conference. The conferences are a combination of pep rally and professional development. After the August conference, I was annoyed I had lost a Saturday, but I felt refocused on why I was here, and like I had learned some valuable things. The conference yesterday just depressed me.
The first session I went to was about how to lead class discussions. And I thought, "I know how to do this. I know how to be a good teacher. I just can't manage kids." I know how it should look. I know what should be going on. I know what I would do in the ideal world. I just can't seem to make that happen. And I also know that this piles up to a bunch of useless excuses.
I went to a session on management, and basically came away with that I need to be more consistent, and I need to have teacher presence - but I don't know how to do that, or maybe I've just given up on it. And I know that in that I am failing children.
I think that I know how to be the teacher in a school like in that where I was a student. Or in such a culture. I don't know if I don't know how to be a good manager here, or it just hurts my soul too much (because it still feels mean to me). And I think part of me isn't 100% sure I have the authority to be bossing teenagers around.
So end of yesterday, I was pretty down. I felt like I was failing kids by failing to manage them, but that I didn't even really WANT to manage them. I just wanted it all to go away.
But this is where faith comes in.
I have faith that I am here for a reason.
I have faith that that reason is not to screw up children.
I have faith that God works everything for the good of those who know and love Him.
I have faith that my work is not in vain.
I have faith that I can keep getting a little better everyday.
I have faith that my God will sustain me day-to-day.
For as run-down as I have felt at the end of some days, when I am at my lowest, the next day is always a little bit better.
Like the day I gave half of my juniors detention for messing around and not working, and they threatened to complain to the principal (although I'm sure if you asked them, they'd rationalize their position a lot more). I cried that night. I cried the next morning in the car on the way to school. I was convinced I was going to walk into a class of hate. Yet it seemed like they'd forgotten.
Other moments of hope:
- The day before fall break, the young man whom I have given by far the most detentions to told me that English is his favorite class because we always do something fun.
- A sophomore knew what "acme" and "nadir" meant.
- In 10th grade we are reading A Midsummer Night's Dream. Tuesday I had the kids do some research about Shakespeare. Thursday we read the first scene with the mechanicals, and one of the laborers is protesting having to play a woman. "Who acted in plays in Shakespeare's time?" I asked the class. "Women!" most students called back. They actually learned something!
- A bunch of old ladies hugged me at church today.
- In 11th grade we read Hawthorne's short story "The Minister's Black Veil." I asked the students to come up with a modern parallel of when we judge someone by how they dress/groom. Students came up with things from burkas to haircuts.
"He loved her, of course, but better than that, he chose her, day after day. Choice: that was the thing." - Sherman Alexie
Here's to choosing hope -
Anneke
"Courage doesn't always roar. Sometimes courage is the little voice at the end of the day that says, 'I'll try again tomorrow.'" - Mary Anne Radmacher
If that is not the story of all life, it is at least the story of my life right now.
Yesterday (Saturday) was our second all-day TFA conference. The conferences are a combination of pep rally and professional development. After the August conference, I was annoyed I had lost a Saturday, but I felt refocused on why I was here, and like I had learned some valuable things. The conference yesterday just depressed me.
The first session I went to was about how to lead class discussions. And I thought, "I know how to do this. I know how to be a good teacher. I just can't manage kids." I know how it should look. I know what should be going on. I know what I would do in the ideal world. I just can't seem to make that happen. And I also know that this piles up to a bunch of useless excuses.
I went to a session on management, and basically came away with that I need to be more consistent, and I need to have teacher presence - but I don't know how to do that, or maybe I've just given up on it. And I know that in that I am failing children.
I think that I know how to be the teacher in a school like in that where I was a student. Or in such a culture. I don't know if I don't know how to be a good manager here, or it just hurts my soul too much (because it still feels mean to me). And I think part of me isn't 100% sure I have the authority to be bossing teenagers around.
So end of yesterday, I was pretty down. I felt like I was failing kids by failing to manage them, but that I didn't even really WANT to manage them. I just wanted it all to go away.
But this is where faith comes in.
I have faith that I am here for a reason.
I have faith that that reason is not to screw up children.
I have faith that God works everything for the good of those who know and love Him.
I have faith that my work is not in vain.
I have faith that I can keep getting a little better everyday.
I have faith that my God will sustain me day-to-day.
For as run-down as I have felt at the end of some days, when I am at my lowest, the next day is always a little bit better.
Like the day I gave half of my juniors detention for messing around and not working, and they threatened to complain to the principal (although I'm sure if you asked them, they'd rationalize their position a lot more). I cried that night. I cried the next morning in the car on the way to school. I was convinced I was going to walk into a class of hate. Yet it seemed like they'd forgotten.
Other moments of hope:
- The day before fall break, the young man whom I have given by far the most detentions to told me that English is his favorite class because we always do something fun.
- A sophomore knew what "acme" and "nadir" meant.
- In 10th grade we are reading A Midsummer Night's Dream. Tuesday I had the kids do some research about Shakespeare. Thursday we read the first scene with the mechanicals, and one of the laborers is protesting having to play a woman. "Who acted in plays in Shakespeare's time?" I asked the class. "Women!" most students called back. They actually learned something!
- A bunch of old ladies hugged me at church today.
- In 11th grade we read Hawthorne's short story "The Minister's Black Veil." I asked the students to come up with a modern parallel of when we judge someone by how they dress/groom. Students came up with things from burkas to haircuts.
"He loved her, of course, but better than that, he chose her, day after day. Choice: that was the thing." - Sherman Alexie
Here's to choosing hope -
Anneke
Monday, October 19, 2015
Breaking apart and together
Look! Our smiling faces! Appreciate them while you can! Although, as I was reminded by our pastor's sermon this Sunday, we should all be smiling more. These particular smiles are perched atop a bridge amid a cornfield maze during our jaunt up north.
Our week-long fall break was a much needed reprieve. After going for 10 weeks (that's the same as if it were Thanksgiving if you started after Labor Day) we needed room to breathe and relax, not just escape. We took up residence at my grandparents' house, where it was lovely to not be the adultiest adults around :) Someone made my bed?! Someone made me breakfast?! Someone made me hot chocolate?!
Family and friends back in Michigan reminded me of the importance of support and community. And that I am loved and love a lot of people. They're just not here. But I think too often I let my school persona take over my life; I let who my students think I am (and who they shape me into being) be who I am. As I told a friend, it was almost a shock to here someone call me, "Anneke." I hardly ever hear that. To students I'm "Ms. Vander Haak." To colleagues I'm "Vander Haak." And living with only one other person, names aren't necessary much.
But who I am is a lot bigger that my life in room 123.
Here's to claiming back my life a bit this quarter -
Two moments from break that touched my soul:
Monday morning my grandparents took us to the Japanese garden at Meijer Gardens. And I teared up a bit - combination of homesickness, perspective, and rest. I need to get out in nature more.
Perhaps paradoxically, another moment that gave me some resolve and strength was with another teenager, a past student. We went out two afternoons, and among the many other comments, laughs, and large piles of food, she told me two things that stuck with me - 1) "It's not you; it's them. You know that, right?" [I know I could be a better teacher, but my failings as a teacher don't make me a bad person. And somehow I believe it more coming from a studentish person.] 2) "You changed my perspective on school. You showed me that teachers care."
Here's to sticking it out to show more students that I care -
Here's to remembering why we are here -
Anneke
Saturday, October 3, 2015
From crackers to volleyball
Last week Friday, an unidentified student in one of my classes threw crackers at my back whenever I turned to write on the board.
This week Friday, the same class attempted to play hide-and-go-seek and have dance parties in the back corners.
But you know what? Somehow I am feeling better about life. Not that I wasn't a sobbing mess Wednesday, wallowing in self-pity. But Thursday was better. And Friday was fine. And I made it to the weekend. One more week until fall break and we head up north!
Thursday afternoon, 7th and 8th periods, the high school had "free play," meaning volleyball and basketball in the gym, various activities outside, concessions, games, etc. Instead of getting me out of any class, this took over my planning periods, which originally kind of annoyed me. I mean, instead of getting work done, I had to stand and watch teenagers--the same teenagers who generally seemed to feel animosity towards me. For the first hour, I was stationed inside, watching the games table. A bit boring. But the second hour, someone took over the games table, and I wandered outside.
Outside, I discovered another world. Yes, we were standing in a parking lot. But there was a bit of woods on the other side, and the weather had turned lovely overnight--the sun shone through the leaves, and the wind blew pleasantly. Students stood and ran around laughing. It was beautiful to just STAND there. And then one of my students pulled me into playing volleyball on her team. And I had FUN. WITH MY STUDENTS. DOING SOMETHING BESIDES SCHOOL. Maybe they don't hate me; they just hate school.
Earlier that same day I actually had a student THANK ME. For giving her a handout with all the vocabulary words and definitions. And the next day, the same girl told me she had used the Quizlet I had set up to study at home! And she felt good about the upcoming test!
Friday my classes typed up their essays and peer reviewed. I gave them a form, with spots for 2 reviewers, each listing 2 things "you did really well" and 2 things "you could make even better." Therein lay my mistake. The tenth graders wrote memoirs, so a few girls misinterpreted the second question, giving me responses like
"You could stop putting a lot of trust in people."
and
"You could have beat her up! LOL!"
And now, for some other student work (this week, more of the thoughtful and less humorous variety):
After reading The Glass Castle...
Q: Is the Walls family a good or bad family?
A: There's no such thing as a good or bad family. Every family has a different personality, a different mindset, a different way of living. Some families believe in tough love. Give you obstacles that challenge you to get you ready for the real world. Some families believe in the easy way for their children so: 'My kids will have everything I didn't have when I was younger.' Parent who's willing to basically fight every obstacle their child has! Some families might think their way of living or acting is good; others might think it's sad. Everyone has a reason behind the way their family is.
After reading part of Kaffir Boy...
Q: What scene was most memorable? Why?
A: The scene when the woman explains her dead son [he is stabbed after joining a gang]. It's memorable because events like this happen in America to African American males.
Q: How does the voice of Ms. Walls in The Glass Castle compare to the voice of Mr. Mathabane?
A: Their voice is very different. Ms. Walls' was more soft and innocent in the beginning and turned into understanding towards the end, the boy's voice was aggressive in the beginning and compassionate at the end.
A: They both have crazy parents that kind of affect their life in a bad way. Yet they have some kind of love in the story.
A: The fathers in both stories are both reckless and don't care about nobody else but themselves.
A: The voices have a similar tone on how somebody tried to ruin their life and that someone always wanted them to be better.
A: I think they're the same because they both are striving to do better, and achieve more than what their parents were doing. Both authors want to live a better life; whether it's to make their parents happy or themselves.
After looking at the American ideal of freedom all quarter...
Q: What is one way you are free?
A: Ways I think I am free is that I get the opportunity to go to school every day. Even though I don't appreciate it as I should. Some kids don't get the opportunity to go to school when they want to. Another reason is that I get the chance to see my family every day I wake up.
Today is another beautiful fall day. We made it through the summer I thought would never end. Off to get donuts and coffee before a spot of grading and planning! Maybe we'll even go to a park, now that it's possible to exist outside without sweating (I slept in a sweatshirt last night!).
Love to all,
Anneke
This week Friday, the same class attempted to play hide-and-go-seek and have dance parties in the back corners.
But you know what? Somehow I am feeling better about life. Not that I wasn't a sobbing mess Wednesday, wallowing in self-pity. But Thursday was better. And Friday was fine. And I made it to the weekend. One more week until fall break and we head up north!
Thursday afternoon, 7th and 8th periods, the high school had "free play," meaning volleyball and basketball in the gym, various activities outside, concessions, games, etc. Instead of getting me out of any class, this took over my planning periods, which originally kind of annoyed me. I mean, instead of getting work done, I had to stand and watch teenagers--the same teenagers who generally seemed to feel animosity towards me. For the first hour, I was stationed inside, watching the games table. A bit boring. But the second hour, someone took over the games table, and I wandered outside.
Outside, I discovered another world. Yes, we were standing in a parking lot. But there was a bit of woods on the other side, and the weather had turned lovely overnight--the sun shone through the leaves, and the wind blew pleasantly. Students stood and ran around laughing. It was beautiful to just STAND there. And then one of my students pulled me into playing volleyball on her team. And I had FUN. WITH MY STUDENTS. DOING SOMETHING BESIDES SCHOOL. Maybe they don't hate me; they just hate school.
Earlier that same day I actually had a student THANK ME. For giving her a handout with all the vocabulary words and definitions. And the next day, the same girl told me she had used the Quizlet I had set up to study at home! And she felt good about the upcoming test!
Friday my classes typed up their essays and peer reviewed. I gave them a form, with spots for 2 reviewers, each listing 2 things "you did really well" and 2 things "you could make even better." Therein lay my mistake. The tenth graders wrote memoirs, so a few girls misinterpreted the second question, giving me responses like
"You could stop putting a lot of trust in people."
and
"You could have beat her up! LOL!"
And now, for some other student work (this week, more of the thoughtful and less humorous variety):
After reading The Glass Castle...
Q: Is the Walls family a good or bad family?
A: There's no such thing as a good or bad family. Every family has a different personality, a different mindset, a different way of living. Some families believe in tough love. Give you obstacles that challenge you to get you ready for the real world. Some families believe in the easy way for their children so: 'My kids will have everything I didn't have when I was younger.' Parent who's willing to basically fight every obstacle their child has! Some families might think their way of living or acting is good; others might think it's sad. Everyone has a reason behind the way their family is.
After reading part of Kaffir Boy...
Q: What scene was most memorable? Why?
A: The scene when the woman explains her dead son [he is stabbed after joining a gang]. It's memorable because events like this happen in America to African American males.
Q: How does the voice of Ms. Walls in The Glass Castle compare to the voice of Mr. Mathabane?
A: Their voice is very different. Ms. Walls' was more soft and innocent in the beginning and turned into understanding towards the end, the boy's voice was aggressive in the beginning and compassionate at the end.
A: They both have crazy parents that kind of affect their life in a bad way. Yet they have some kind of love in the story.
A: The fathers in both stories are both reckless and don't care about nobody else but themselves.
A: The voices have a similar tone on how somebody tried to ruin their life and that someone always wanted them to be better.
A: I think they're the same because they both are striving to do better, and achieve more than what their parents were doing. Both authors want to live a better life; whether it's to make their parents happy or themselves.
After looking at the American ideal of freedom all quarter...
Q: What is one way you are free?
A: Ways I think I am free is that I get the opportunity to go to school every day. Even though I don't appreciate it as I should. Some kids don't get the opportunity to go to school when they want to. Another reason is that I get the chance to see my family every day I wake up.
Today is another beautiful fall day. We made it through the summer I thought would never end. Off to get donuts and coffee before a spot of grading and planning! Maybe we'll even go to a park, now that it's possible to exist outside without sweating (I slept in a sweatshirt last night!).
Love to all,
Anneke
Friday, September 18, 2015
Chicken men, oil changes, and scrawberries
Hello world! If you keep up with us on here, you might have noticed we haven't blogged much recently. That's because we try to keep it somewhat positive on here, and we have been feeling a bit down. So, prayers appreciated, AND here is a little bit lighter (well, mostly) fare that made me smile and I hope will reach you, too. So, with no further ado, I present student work!
Q: What is one way in which you are free?
A: "I am free because I can sit with different racists. I am also free because I don't have a slave owner and I am getting an education."
I have to admit, I cracked up the first time I read that journal entry. (No, that is not a typo.) However, mistake aside (I'm not sure if you could really call that a malapropism?), she has some good things to say. First, I appreciate the big emphasis many of the kids here put on racial integration as a freedom. In some ways, there is a large emphasis on race a lot of the time, and in other ways, not at all.
This week I did have a girl tell me that she was going to get her hair straightened so it would be "flimsy" like mine. "Are you calling my hair 'flimsy'?" "Yes." I let it go.
One time this week I also went over to a desk group of students and remarked that it smelled like sunscreen. A girl told me it was probably her lotion, but the students turned to me eagerly: "Do you wear sunscreen a lot?!" "Um...in the summer I guess." Oh, right. Didn't know sunscreen was going to be such a fascinating topic.
I was also delighted to see the connection between freedom and education :) When I assigned an essay on Friday ("500 words?! That's too long!!!" "This is the length of the shortest essays I wrote in high school." "That's YOUR high school!"), a kid told me, "I'm not free because I have to write this paper." "Would you rather leave school? Go ahead! Are you going to be free then?" "No...that's not what I meant...."
We read Sojourner Truth's "And Ain't I a Woman?" in American Literature (11th).
Q: Are Sojourner Truth's arguments about equality for women and minorities still relevant today?
A: "Yes, because they are human."
Q: Pick one sentence in "And Ain't I a Woman?" and draw a picture.
I'm not entirely sure what is going on there. I remarked to the artist that the man looked like a chicken, and he laughed and told me it was the man's hair. Some sort of sexist portrayal, with the man earning money and the woman taking care of the children at home...but why is she so angry? (Angry about the sexism?)
Q: What is one way in which you are free?
A: "I am free because I can sit with different racists. I am also free because I don't have a slave owner and I am getting an education."
I have to admit, I cracked up the first time I read that journal entry. (No, that is not a typo.) However, mistake aside (I'm not sure if you could really call that a malapropism?), she has some good things to say. First, I appreciate the big emphasis many of the kids here put on racial integration as a freedom. In some ways, there is a large emphasis on race a lot of the time, and in other ways, not at all.
This week I did have a girl tell me that she was going to get her hair straightened so it would be "flimsy" like mine. "Are you calling my hair 'flimsy'?" "Yes." I let it go.
One time this week I also went over to a desk group of students and remarked that it smelled like sunscreen. A girl told me it was probably her lotion, but the students turned to me eagerly: "Do you wear sunscreen a lot?!" "Um...in the summer I guess." Oh, right. Didn't know sunscreen was going to be such a fascinating topic.
I was also delighted to see the connection between freedom and education :) When I assigned an essay on Friday ("500 words?! That's too long!!!" "This is the length of the shortest essays I wrote in high school." "That's YOUR high school!"), a kid told me, "I'm not free because I have to write this paper." "Would you rather leave school? Go ahead! Are you going to be free then?" "No...that's not what I meant...."
We read Sojourner Truth's "And Ain't I a Woman?" in American Literature (11th).
Q: Are Sojourner Truth's arguments about equality for women and minorities still relevant today?
A: "Yes, because they are human."
Q: Pick one sentence in "And Ain't I a Woman?" and draw a picture.
I'm not entirely sure what is going on there. I remarked to the artist that the man looked like a chicken, and he laughed and told me it was the man's hair. Some sort of sexist portrayal, with the man earning money and the woman taking care of the children at home...but why is she so angry? (Angry about the sexism?)
I like this girl's answer to question 7 (same question as above as to if these rights are still important today). Her picture made me crack up - but it's a good extension, a good modern application! Maybe we aren't stepping into carriages of our own abilities anymore to prove anything, but we can change the oil!
"You sinned me!"
Q: What are features of African American Vernacular English?
Some of these responses made me want to dance and start pulling out phonetic symbols and examples (DO YOU SEE HOW [ð] turns into [d]?!?! Do you see how postvocalic "r"s are deleted?!)
Q: In your group, write a short story using all of the week's vocabulary words.
Cheers!
Anneke
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